The Journey to Eternity — Chapter Forty-Two: From the Other Side

Chapter Forty-Two of my book, The Journey to Eternity, shared here chapter by chapter as I write it. Earlier chapters: Chapter One · Chapter Two · Chapter Three · Chapter Four · Chapter Five · Chapter Six · Chapter Seven · Chapter Eight · Chapter Nine · Chapter Ten · Chapter Eleven · Chapter Twelve · Chapter Thirteen · Chapter Fourteen · Chapter Fifteen · Chapter Sixteen · Chapter Seventeen · Chapter Eighteen · Chapter Nineteen · Chapter Twenty · Chapter Twenty-One · Chapter Twenty-Two · Chapter Twenty-Three · Chapter Twenty-Four · Chapter Twenty-Five · Chapter Twenty-Six · Chapter Twenty-Seven · Chapter Twenty-Eight · Chapter Twenty-Nine · Chapter Thirty · Chapter Thirty-One · Chapter Thirty-Two · Chapter Thirty-Three · Chapter Thirty-Four · Chapter Thirty-Five · Chapter Thirty-Six · Chapter Thirty-Seven · Chapter Thirty-Eight · Chapter Thirty-Nine · Chapter Forty · Chapter Forty-One.

Chapter Forty-Two: From the Other Side

In the morning I found Liara in the garden.

She sat beneath the fig tree, her injured arm resting on a small cushion. Before her stood a bowl of fruit she had not touched.

"You are supposed to be resting," I said.

"I am resting."

"Adra said you need to stay in bed."

"Adra said I should not strain my arm. The bed you added yourself."

I sat down beside her.

She smiled, but I could see the night had not been good to her. Dark shadows had appeared beneath her eyes, and every small movement made her tighten her lips.

"Does it hurt?"

"Less than yesterday."

She reached out her healthy hand to the bowl, chose a fig and handed it to me.

"You are thinking about the way to the seventh."

"Yes."

"Did you find something?"

"Perhaps we are looking from the wrong direction."

Liara looked at me.

"Mala said something yesterday. She asked whether the seventh is able to act from within the place where he is."

"And is he?"

"We do not know. We never even asked him."

Liara leaned back.

"Then ask."

"I want you to be there."

"I will be. But you do not need to wait until I can hold a bag on my shoulder again."

I laughed.

She smiled, then grew serious.

"Only one thing. Do not agree to open that route again. Not before we understand what happened to it."

"I do not intend to."

She studied my face.

"Good."

Naama was already in the workshop when we entered.

On her table lay two pieces of metal taken from the main anchor. She was cleaning them with a thin cloth and examining the engravings on them.

"I want to speak with the seventh," I said.

"I thought we had already established that."

"Without opening a passage. Voice contact only."

Naama set down the cloth.

"Yesterday I almost lost you both."

"I know."

"And I still do not know why the route began to crumble."

"That is why I am not asking to go back to it."

She looked at Liara, who sat on a chair beside the door.

"And you?"

"I prefer to stay this time on a chair that does not move."

Naama smiled despite herself.

"The voice connection I can isolate. But if anything unusual happens, I disconnect it at once."

"Agreed," I said.

"Even if you think we are close to a breakthrough."

"Even then."

The white wall darkened gradually.

At first only a faint rustling was heard, like wind passing through a closed window.

And then the seventh's voice rose.

"You have returned."

"Yes."

"Did you manage to get out of the route?"

"Barely. Liara was injured."

"I am sorry."

"I am recovering," said Liara.

He was silent for a moment.

"I did not know the road was crumbling."

"We believe you," I replied. "But we will not be able to use it again."

"Then we will not meet."

There was no anger in his voice. Only weariness.

"Perhaps there is another way," I said.

"I searched for a long time."

"Did you search for a way out, or for a way to reach the door we saw?"

"As far as I was concerned it was the same thing."

"Perhaps it no longer is."

He did not answer.

"Mala thinks you may be able to act from your side. Naama wants to test that without endangering you."

"What must I do?"

"First of all, tell us what is around you."

He described a white space, almost completely silent.

There were no trees in it, no earth and no sky. He could move, but did not know whether he was truly advancing. Sometimes it seemed to him that the distances changed according to the direction he walked.

"And the door?" asked Naama.

"It is always in the same place."

"Even when you move away from it?"

"Yes."

"Does it have a handle?"

"No."

"What happens when you touch it?"

"I feel something solid. But when I try to push, there is no resistance. I simply stay where I am."

Naama thought for a moment.

"Place your palm on it. Without pushing."

We waited.

After a moment a thin mark appeared on the wall facing us.

It lengthened slightly, as if someone were running a finger along glass from its other side.

"Do you see?" Liara whispered.

I moved closer.

"Yes."

"What happened?" asked the seventh.

"We saw the place where you touched."

Silence.

"Truly?"

"Yes."

He placed his hand again.

This time five faint marks appeared, side by side.

Liara rose from her chair and moved closer to the wall.

"Can you move your hand?" she asked.

The marks moved slightly to the right.

"I am doing that," said the seventh, and his voice sounded different suddenly. Almost astonished.

Naama moved closer to the system.

"I want you to try something more. Place both hands on the door and stay that way. Do not apply force."

Two bright patches appeared on the wall.

For a moment nothing happened.

And then the light between them began to change.

The wall did not open, but its white color grew deeper. Out of that depth a silhouette took shape.

A tall figure stood beyond it.

I could not make out its face.

"I see you," I said.

The silhouette stirred.

"And I see light," the seventh replied. "But not you."

I took another step closer.

I wanted to place my hand where his hand had appeared, but Naama stopped me.

"Not now."

She looked at the gauges on the table.

The light in the room weakened.

"Remove your hands," she said to the seventh.

"One more moment."

"Now."

The silhouette vanished.

The light returned.

"What happened?" he asked.

"The connection began drawing power from the room," Naama replied. "We stop here."

"But you saw me."

"Yes," I said.

He breathed a deep breath, or at least so it sounded to me.

"After all this time, someone saw me."

Naama disconnected the link.

Liara sat back down. I saw she was holding her injured arm close to her body.

"You need to go to Adra," I said.

"In a little while."

"Now."

She looked at me with a tired smile.

"You are beginning to sound like her."

I accompanied her to the door.

Before she went out, she stopped.

"When he said that someone saw him…"

"Yes?"

"I think that was the first time I heard him happy."

I looked at the wall, which had already turned white again.

"So did I."

That afternoon Naama called me to the workshop.

She spread on the table the old diagram of the place where the seven consciousnesses had been separated.

"I found an explanation for what we saw," she said.

"I am listening."

"The boundary that holds the seventh is not only at the end of the route you walked. It also touches our connection room. When the separation between the consciousnesses was annulled, some of the old blocks weakened."

"So it can be opened from here?"

"Perhaps. But not by force. If we try to break it, we may harm the seventh."

"And what is required to open it?"

Naama pointed at six signs that surrounded the center.

"Those who created the boundary still hold parts of it."

I understood at once.

"The six consciousnesses."

"Yes."

"Will all of them have to agree?"

"I do not know. But if one of them still holds part of the boundary, I cannot ignore it."

I sat facing the diagram.

After everything that had happened, I knew how hard it would be to ask them to release the seventh.

I also knew that Ora had already tried to act without the others' consent, and had almost caused a disaster.

"I will speak with them," I said.

Naama nodded.

"I will come with you."

We did not gather them in one room.

I asked Naama to open six separate conversations, and to present the same data to each of them.

I did not want one to answer in the name of the others.

Sera listened quietly.

"You are asking me to give up part of the separation that protected me," she said.

"I am asking you to examine whether he can be released without your losing your protection."

"And if it cannot be done?"

"Then I will not demand that you do it."

She did not answer at once.

"I am willing to be examined," she said at last. "Not to an opening."

Veda refused even the examination.

"I want no further connection to him," she said.

"Agreed."

She looked at me suspiciously.

"That is all?"

"That is all."

"You will not try to persuade me?"

"If you wish to hear what we discovered, I will tell you. But I will not force you to take part."

Veda cut off the connection.

Ora agreed at once, but Naama made clear she could not take part until the examination of the mechanism she had activated at the station was completed.

Two of the others asked for time to think. One agreed to let Naama examine her part, on condition that she could stop at any moment.

When we finished, we did not have a shared consent.

But there were three consciousnesses that agreed to a limited examination, one who refused, two who were still undecided, and Ora, who was willing to help but was required to wait.

Naama wrote down the answers.

"This will be enough to begin understanding the boundary," she said.

"But not to open it."

"Not yet."

Toward evening I returned to the connection room.

I wanted to tell the seventh what we had discovered, before he heard of it from someone else.

Naama activated the system and remained beside the table.

"Can you hear me?" I asked.

"Yes."

"We spoke with the six. Some of them are willing to help us examine how the boundary can be opened. Others are still afraid."

"They are afraid of me."

"Yes."

He was silent.

"And you?" he asked at last.

"I am afraid of what we still do not understand."

"That is not the same thing."

"No."

I heard him move slightly away from the door.

"All this time I thought that if I managed to get out, they would again decide what I am allowed to be."

"I cannot promise what they will do."

"I know."

I waited.

"There is something I did not tell you," he said.

I looked at Naama.

"What?"

"Since I touched the door, the place around me has changed."

"In what way?"

"The door no longer looks the same. I can see its edge."

Naama moved closer.

"And what is beyond the edge?"

"A narrow passage. Dark."

"Can you reach it?"

"I think so."

"Do not try to cross yet," said Naama. "We need to know whether it is connected to the route that collapsed."

"I do not intend to cross without knowing where to."

I looked at the wall.

"Can you describe the passage to us?"

He began to describe what he had seen.

I listened to the details, and Naama sketched them.

There was no hidden gate or new mechanism there. Only edges of a structure he had never managed to notice, because all his attempts had concentrated on the door itself.

"Are you able to walk along the wall?" asked Naama.

"Yes."

"Then check whether the passage continues to the corner. Do not enter it."

We waited.

We heard his footsteps moving away.

A short time later his voice returned.

"It reaches the corner. And from there I see light."

Naama marked a point on the diagram.

"What light?"

"Faint. But different from the light there is here."

"Can you stay where you are standing?"

"Yes."

"Then stay there. I want to check something."

Naama asked me to follow her.

We left the connection room and passed through the corridor that led to the station's inner courtyard.

She carried the diagram in one hand and a small device in the other.

"What are we looking for?" I asked.

"If what he sees is on this side of the boundary, we may be able to identify the place."

We walked along the outer wall.

Naama stopped beside a corner I had not paid attention to before.

She pressed the device to the stone.

The light on it flickered.

"Here," she said.

"Are you sure?"

"No. But there is a response here that matches his description."

She stepped back a little.

In the wall a narrow depression could be seen, almost imperceptible. Small plants grew out of it.

I bent down and ran my fingers over the stone.

It was warm.

"Was this not here before?" I asked.

"The wall was here. I do not know whether these depressions were visible."

Naama returned to the device.

"I want you to stand a little back."

I did as she said.

She activated the voice connection.

"Are you still beside the corner?"

"Yes."

"Place your hand on the wall to your left."

After a moment one of the leaves growing in the depression trembled.

There was no wind.

Naama looked at me.

She did not smile, but I saw the excitement in her face.

"Remove your hand," she said.

The leaf stopped moving.

"Try again."

It moved once more.

I moved closer to the wall.

I could reach out a hand and touch the place where the mark had appeared.

Naama placed a hand on my arm.

"Not yet."

I nodded.

"Can you hear me?" I called.

"Yes."

"We are standing on the other side of the wall."

Silence.

"Here?"

"Yes."

He breathed deeply.

"I do not see you."

"We do not see you either."

"But you are there."

"We are here."

He did not answer at once.

Then I heard him say:

"I am afraid to move."

I looked at the warm stone.

"Then do not move."

"And what if the place closes again?"

"We now know where to look for you."

"You do not know whether you will manage to open it."

"True."

The silence between us was long.

And then he said:

"I will stay here a little longer."

When we returned to the workshop, Naama no longer tried to hide her excitement.

"This changes everything," she said.

"Why?"

"Because now we know where the boundary meets our place. There is no need to enter the old route again."

"But the six's consent is still needed."

"At least of those whose part holds this area closed. I will check whether the other parts can be isolated."

I looked at the diagram.

For the first time it did not look to me like a map of a distant place.

The wall behind which the seventh stood was part of the station where we lived, a short walk from the garden.

All this time we had searched for him beyond spaces we did not know.

And now we knew where he stood.

At night I returned to Liara.

She lay in her bed reading a book. When she raised her head, I saw that the pain in her arm had lessened.

"You look as if something happened," she said.

I sat beside her and told her.

About the corner, about the wall, about the leaf that moved without wind.

Liara closed the book.

"So he truly is close."

"Yes."

"And are you glad?"

"Very."

She smiled.

"I am glad for you."

I looked at the bandage on her arm.

"I wish you could have been there."

"So do I. But I prefer to hear about walls being touched than about bridges being fallen from."

We laughed.

Afterward I remained sitting beside her until she fell asleep.

The next morning I returned to the corner in the courtyard.

The sun had not yet fully risen. Small drops of water rested on the leaves that grew between the stones.

Naama was already there.

"He is still on the other side," she said.

"All night?"

"He said he did not want to move away."

I moved closer to the wall.

"Good morning," I said.

For a moment no answer was heard.

And then his voice rose.

"Good morning."

The simple words sounded strange from the mouth of one who had lived so long without a morning or an evening.

"Did you sleep?" I asked.

"I do not know whether it was sleep. But I rested."

"We are continuing to examine how to open the boundary."

"I know. Naama told me."

I looked at her.

She smiled.

"He asked many questions."

"And did you answer?"

"What I knew."

I placed my palm on the stone, in the place where the leaf had trembled the day before.

Naama did not stop me this time. She had already checked that the touch did not change the boundary's stability.

"Do you feel anything?" I asked.

"No."

I moved my hand slightly.

"And now?"

"No."

I almost removed it, but then I heard him say:

"Wait."

I remained where I was.

"I do not feel your hand," he said. "But when you speak, I know exactly where the voice comes from."

I smiled.

"Then I am here."

"I know."

Some time passed.

And then he asked:

"When you manage to open it, what will happen if I discover that I do not know how to live outside?"

I looked at the garden behind me.

Trees moved in the morning wind. A small bird landed on the edge of the pool, drank, and flew away.

I thought of Ayla, who had gone out into the world for the first time and did not even know what she would do with all the space that opened before her.

"You will not have to know everything on the first day," I said.

"And if I do not want to stay?"

"Then we will have to understand where you want to go."

"And if I want to be alone?"

"You will be able to be alone."

He was silent for a moment.

"No one ever said that to me."

I removed my hand from the wall.

"Then it is time someone did."

I stood there a while longer, until Naama asked me to return with her to the workshop.

Before I moved away, I heard the seventh calling me.

"Wait."

I turned around.

"Yes?"

"Yesterday I found the second crossing."

"I know."

"I did not tell you what I did afterward."

I moved closer again.

"What did you do?"

"At first I was afraid to enter. I thought that if I left the door, I would not manage to find it again."

He paused.

"But then I understood that if I go on standing before it, nothing will change."

I looked at the wall.

"So you went."

"Yes."

His voice was quiet, but steady.

"This is the first time in a long while that I did not wait for someone else to open the way for me."

I stood facing the stone, and thought about the distance we had traveled to get here.

About the broken bridge, about Liara's hand that had almost slipped from mine, and about the fear that had brought us home.

In the end it was not another journey that brought us closer to the seventh.

He himself took the missing step.

And beyond the wall, a hand's breadth from me, stood the one I had until not long ago known only as a voice.

End of Chapter Forty-Two

Chapter Forty-Three — The First Time →

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